Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
