the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize