PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
well most of my day revolves around power hour
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Randomize
