This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
