Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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