real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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