But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm jealous of your bromance
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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