Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
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