i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
The Olympian is in my bed
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize