It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
