If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
