If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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