Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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