It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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