did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
