The maid of honor just puked.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
