do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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