Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
