whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
my mouth tastes like poor choices
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
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