I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
She's JV to your varsity
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize