You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
