Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
