Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Randomize
