I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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