So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Randomize
