it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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