I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
