Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
