Whatcha textin bout Willis?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
