no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
