I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
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