Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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