i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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