we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize