Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
