I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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