Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
