i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
