I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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