You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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