Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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