Soap is not a condiment
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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