At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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