So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Found the puke drawer
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
