Dual....:-)
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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