HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Randomize