just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
