I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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