we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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