Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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