We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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