East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
